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                  長大后最吃虧的,往往是這種孩子

                  來源:格言大全-yespu.com 日期:2019-03-28 12:42:24 分類:家庭教育 閱讀:

                  長大后最吃虧的,往往是這種孩子

                    文/夢丹

                    “這塊橡皮真香,借我用幾天吧!”

                    “你這個筆記本能送給我嗎?”

                    “你家還有什么好吃的?拿出來一起分享吧。”

                    女兒同學夏夏來家寫作業,從攤開作業本的那一剎那,夏夏總是會時不時地提出各種要求,女兒都一一答應下來。

                    臨走時,夏夏抱著女兒的圣誕節禮物——豬豬偶戀戀不舍:“這小豬豬好可,借我玩幾天吧,這樣晚上摟著它睡覺我就不害怕了......”

                    女兒忍痛點頭說:“好吧,就兩個晚上哦。”

                    那只小豬,最終夏夏以各種借口沒有還回來。

                    愛因斯坦說:小事小節斤斤計較而淡漠大事大節的人,是不會有什么作為的。

                    人情通達,不貪不占,是一個人為人處世最基本的修養

                    對于年紀尚小,還未走上社會的孩子而言,能懂得這點更為重要

                    那些愛占便宜的孩子,手持機,堵死了所有回程的路,輸掉的是人生格局

                    1

                    愛占便宜的孩子,更容易機遇擦肩而過

                    占便宜丟掉的,可能是相處于世最重要的真誠契約。

                    記得有這樣一個故事

                    一個女孩畢業后去了法國,開始半工半讀的留學生活

                    她發現當地公共交通系統有漏洞可循:車站是開放式的,沒有檢票口,也沒有檢票員,一切,全憑自覺。

                    女孩耍起了小聰明,她開始逃票,并為自己占到小便宜、節省了生活費而沾沾自喜。

                    四年后,當女孩以優異的成績畢業并躊躇滿志地應聘巴黎那些跨國公司時,初審過后,無一例外都被婉言拒絕

                    一次次的失敗,讓女孩積滿了憤怒

                    當再一次面對一家大公司的拒絕時,她認定公司有種族歧視傾向,不料對方卻答道:

                    “看到你的教育背景和學術平,我們非常重視你。但看了你的征信記錄,我們發現你有三次以上乘車逃票被處罰的記錄。”

                    女孩試圖辯解,但對方說:

                    “這個事情證明:你不遵守規則,還善于發現規則中的漏洞并惡意使用,對于這樣的人,我們是沒辦法信任的,工作中,很多事情要靠自覺。”

                    針對女孩的失信行為,那家公司坦誠相告:在法國甚至整個歐洲,她可能都找不到愿意雇傭她的公司。

                    沒有譴責,也沒有歧視,甚至如果女孩不問,別人原因都不會告訴她。

                    那些愛占便宜的人,會讓身邊人敬而遠之,因此喪失機會和各種人生可能性。

                    這豈不是比直接失去和物質還得不償失嗎?

                    我一個同事部門聚餐、娛樂,她總是借故遲了一點,以此占小便宜,逃避付賬。

                    后來偶然被人揭穿,大家不說什么,但都不約而同地疏離她,再有活動時,集體選擇性地遺忘她。

                    羅振宇說:沒有什么道路可以通向真誠,而真誠本身就是道路。

                    一次謊言的拆穿,會使得之前的所有誠信蒙上一層灰,不再容易被信任。

                    丟掉真誠的孩子,路窄且阻,飛不高,也難以飛得遠。

                    2

                    愛占便宜的孩子,長大后易與幸福失之交臂

                    綜藝節目《愛情保衛站》曾有一期,太原女孩因為男友愛占便宜想要分手

                    她的男朋友,處處耍心機,耍小聰明,占便宜:

                    逛超市,非要等中午時分才去,一進超市就各種試吃。

                    服務員不讓,就跟人家吵:“我不知道好吃不好吃,怎么買?”

                    試吃完了稱斤裝袋,溜達一圈后,把食品扔一邊不結賬。

                    等出了超市,人也吃飽了。男友還美其名曰:“這不是給家里省糧食嘛。”

                    新衣服不剪商標,穿著嘚瑟兩天,又重新拿回商場換另一個款式穿。

                    帶女朋友飯店吃飯,剛上的蓮藕排骨湯,小伙子明明看到有只蒼蠅在里邊,卻不吱聲,等女朋友吃完肉喝完湯,才叫服務員過來免單贈果盤,就為了少付一個菜錢......

                    男生掙錢并不少,但是他不擇手段占便宜的行為,不但讓女朋友忍無可忍,也讓現場的觀眾唏噓不已。

                    面對大家的質疑,男生口口辨稱:“我也是想能省點就省點,攢下錢讓女朋友過好日子。”

                    那些愛占便宜的人,不一定,但一定缺乏心理能量,即使有錢,他們口中的好日子,也永遠在不可能實現的下一次和以后

                    心理學家認為,每一個貪婪者都是一個弱小孩,他們大多成長于有條件的愛下。

                    為了彌補不被愛或沒有力量的空洞,不得不用占便宜的行為來填補心靈的空洞。

                    《了凡心療愈》中說:“精神匱乏的人擁有再多的錢也只能制造更多的匱乏感,因為他們沒有與之匹配的能力。”

                    貪便宜的背后,是目光短淺,只顧眼前。

                    而這種行為,像一個黑洞,會牢牢吸附那些更遠的倒霉事讓人難以擁有幸福的能力。

                    3

                    父母的修養,就是孩子的教養

                    前段時間,江蘇淮安一位奶奶帶著1歲多的孫子逛超市,隨手抓了一大把散裝蝦條給孫子吃。

                    超市老板娘上前勸:“給寶寶嘗嘗拿幾個就行了,不用拿那么多。”

                    奶奶聽到這話大怒:“一歲多的小孩能吃多少?吃你兩個蝦條,犯法啦?”

                    沒過多久,奶奶的兒媳婦再次找上門來,一邊對著老板娘和攤位錄像,一邊說說要把視頻傳到網上 ,罵聲不斷。

                    老板娘委屈地說:“不是說不能嘗,但是抓一大把也太多了,我們也是要做生意的。”

                    美國心理學家派克說:在稚嫩的孩子心中,父母就是他們的上帝,神圣而威嚴。

                    孩子自然會把父母處理問題的方式全盤接受下來。

                    一次在商場的大食堂吃飯,對面坐了一對母女。

                    吃過飯過后,媽媽把碗筷都放在托盤里,準備放到收餐具的地方。

                    小姑娘說:“媽媽,別人都不用收拾呀?”

                    媽媽說:“別人是別人,咱們要做自己。寶貝要做個有禮貌、有涵養的人是不是?”

                    小姑娘點點頭,于是和媽媽一起高高興興地收拾起來。

                    世上從來沒有天生就壞的孩子,往往是父母的修養,決定了孩子的教養。

                    父母不懂得尊重別人,孩子也會輕視別人。父母斤斤計較,孩子自然不會大度

                    每一個孩子都是一張白紙,他們所有認知、見識都來源于身邊最親近的人。

                    父母愛子,當為之計深遠。

                    想要孩子有更廣闊的未來,就一定要教導他:明朗坦蕩豁達大度。

                    斤斤計較來的,終究是蠅頭小利,而自己創造的,才有可能是大世界

                  X

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